Santana Lopez

ENTRACEWAY

Name: Jaime
AIM: PanickedOz or snoopypezzed
Plurk: snoopypez
Email: panickedoz@aol.com or snoopypez@gmail.com
Timezone: US Eastern
Availability: I have no life. I'm almost always around.
Other: Anything else/important, just leave a comment or PM or whatnot. :D

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A note: Santana as I play her is what I like to call Hot-People-Sexual. That is all.

[Oh my, what's this? an AU version of Wonderland where an event has ever so kindly aged up the previously underage people in the mansion? Well, you don't say! That's exactly what this is!

Santana, however, is not aware of this just yet. She just woke up, after all.

But sooner or later, she will--in a way that is in no way contrived--happen across someone who looks oddly familiar in multiple ways.]

...Trouty Mouth?

[But Sam left, didn't he? WHAT COULD THIS BE? Let's tune in and find out.]

[Sup, guys. Santana is not exactly the gift-giving type, but she went out on a limb and risked her reputation this year by giving some people stuff anyway. Sure, most of them are rather insulting on the surface, but it's the...thought that counts, right? The following people will find stuff in bags outside their door on Christmas Eve night.]

( slightly more people than one would think! )

[Meanwhile, Saintana will be giving every.single.person homemade cookies of multiple flavors. Even Phil the people she doesn't really like much. The people she's closer to will get more things, whatever those may be.]

[Santana, having seen so many others go through that rip thing and back to empty versions of their homes, is not in Lima. She won't go back until she can brace herself for being home and not having Brittany there.

Therefore, she is still in the mansion.

Dressed in this charming outfit and singing this charming song, Santana strolls around the halls and rooms. So very festive.

And kinda bored.

But whatever; she's making it worth your while if you're sticking around the mansion. Basically, anyone she happens to come across, she will sing a couple lines for, flirty and sexy and funfunfunfun, before moving on to the next stray. Even if no one's around, she's singing.


Saintana, of course, is hiding in her new real-side room, horrified by her real-self's forwardness.]

[Let's face it--Santana is not the nicest person on a good day, but even she knows she went a tiiiiny bit overboard during that last event. If she was at all personally awful to you, you can expect a post-it note slid under your door with "Sorry." scrawled on it.

Yes, she clearly put a lot of time and effort into that.

Because the mun failed at playing this event, two specific notes are for Dave (sorry about all that crap in the hallway) and John (sorry I was such a bitch). You're welcome.

That is all.]

[At some point during the day after the event ended, and at some point after Santana decided not to think about how lame she had been about/to Philip... She decided to be a total hypocrite and go torture Kurt a little. Like there was any possible way she wouldn't? He had been totally smitten! Over her!

So she had made her way to his room, a million different awful comments on the tip of her tongue...

And his room was empty.

No no no no no. All of the people Santana could stand were dropping like flies, and she was getting seriously pissed off. Because if she's not angry, she'll be sad, and she will not allow herself to be sad that Kurt Hummel is gone.

She won't.

Therefore, anger nicely in place, she takes it out on the lovely people left in the mansion.]

Okay, which of you anti-social, backwards, deep-fried milk duds around here kidnapped Kurt? Because anything else is pretty much unacceptable.

[Sup, guys in the hot springs. What's that, you say? Girls aren't allowed there when the guys are?

Please.

Santana would enjoy this more if Brittany were here, but oh well. Spying is spying.

SHOW YOURSELVES TO BE JUDGED, BOYS.

ps: she's totally wearing a demure and classy version of the offered outfit.]

[Five year old Santana has grown very bored of the mansion, even with all the candy and cakes and stuff it can offer.

(Look, she barely eats as a teenager. She needs to make up for that now. Obviously.)

This is why she is now trying all the doors and windows.

They're all locked.

This is why she is now kicking all the doors and walls.]

LET ME OUUUUUUUUUUUUUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Once upon a time, Santana and Puck decided to take over glee club because the current and ex-leaders were falling down on the job and being lame about it. This had the added bonus of distracting them from their having killed and been killed, respectively, during the last event.]

Okay, listen up and listen carefully.

Anyone remember that thing where we all get together in the music room and sing? No? Right, that would be because our "fearless leader", who tried so hard to take over everything, has gone into hiding. Not that I blame her; she's probably trying on prosthetic noses from the closet or stealing the clothes off cabbage patch dolls, but the point is:

[She smiles the smile of someone in the middle of a hostile takeover.]

We're calling a meeting.

That's right, you, too can join us in the music room next Friday and sing your little hearts out. Everyone's allowed, cause we're just that accepting. [Did that sound sarcastic? You must be hearing things.] The theme Puckerman and I decided on is duets, so grab a friend and pick a song.

[She holds up a finger.] Couple rules though. No Broadway. Zero. You don't want to know what will happen if you show up and sing Streisand, Berry.

Second, no sappy love ballads. We're wanting to have fun here, not need to pass out barf bags.

That's about it. You know you wanna at least show up and see Puck and me kick everyone's asses with our super hot duet.

[She almost cuts the feed, then remembers something Puck said, and rolls her eyes.] Oh, right. [SHIMMY SHIMMY. There, happy now, Puck?

Aaaand click.]

[Guess who's desperate to pretend nothing happened!]

...So look, I know we're all having super tender moments of forgiveness and self-pity around here, probably set to the score from Full House, but I'm kinda past my allowed limit of emo.

[She says this as if she hasn't spent the time after the event ended throwing up over the knowledge that she killed three people. And sure, one of them was Alex, so like, who really gives a shit, but just because she hates him doesn't mean she wanted to hack him in half.]

Any time things wanna start getting back to normal around here, the better. Hell, let's all go to glee club and sing about our feelings if you want, just...

[She drifts off, then sighs and just hangs up.]

[Why is she still on this side?? What's going on?? Is everyone dead?? The Queen is going to be so maaaaad!! SOB!!!

In other words, little miss Saintana is still on the Real Side, while the Real Thing Santana is mirrorside, doing who knows what. Saintana has spent the whole time pretty much hidden in Santana's room, terrified that the rebellion's violence would carry on over here.

Considering the fires and explosions and crashed trains, she's not really far off there.

Anyway, for the first time, she's venturing out of the room! To the library! She's so brave, guys; come tell her so!]


(replies will be made by itsacoldone, naturally.)

[Guess who is super bored out of her gorgeous skull! That's right, unaware of any upcoming action, little miss Santana over here is laying on the floor, her legs propped up on/against her bed. It's a very ladylike position. She is so very bored, in fact, that she is painting her fingernails...and then removing the polish, only to start over again.]

God, this place sucks.


[mainly just set-up for the event; LOL ALL HER POSTS ARE EXACTLY THE SAME sob]

[Sup, Wonderland! Guess who's back! That's right, this girl. Santana magically shows up in the music room, dressed like this.

She's a little confused.]

Wha--

Where did the stage go...Brittany?

[Looking around...looking...looking...here it comes...]

This looks like...

.......

..................

...Oh hell no. No way. This is not--SEND ME BACK!!

[And here comes the angry spanish.]


[before the event, obviously]

[Santana has not left her room since she discovered that Tim disappeared. Again. This time feels even worse, possibly because even his animals have vanished.

This, adding to the fact that Santana has now been in Wonderland for an entire freakin' year, means she's not having the best time. But she's determined to get past the stage of never-ending sobs. It's different this time because when Brittany left, Tim was still around.

But now she has no one. And she made a huge mistake in actually letting herself grow so attached to any one person, because all that leads to is this. A week of being locked away in the dark, crying and thinking about how the last time you saw the guy, it was during an event that made them clingy and love-tinged--and the last last time you saw the guy, he wasn't even the guy. He was his other creepier masked self.

Anyway, the moral of this story is: Feelings Suck.

She's done.

No more of that shit. Nope, she's just going to keep things casual and nonmonogamous and fun. And at the first hint of feelings, she'll cut and run, the way she did with Puck the first time they actually ever dated.

This is why she very deliberately turns on the video, letting it get a good shot of her, dressed in something short and tight. Not exactly sleazy, but revealing enough to catch eyes. When she speaks, it's with careful control, forced nonchalance.]

Tim's gone. Which means his name is no longer in my vocabulary. Don't speak to me about him, got it? [She leans back, looking for all the world like she's...trying hard to be over it.] I'm moving on, and if any of you out there would like to help me with that, feel free to stop by.

We'll talk, maybe have some fun.

[Why yes, that was a seductive tone she used there. And then she turns off the video and takes a deep breath. This is what she has to do.]

[So okay, Santana woke up feeling not exactly like herself.

Ugh. Feelings.

She can't really name it, and she can't really name why, but she just...really wants to talk to people.

And other stuff. But mostly the talking.

Also, she's not sure how, but she's pretty sure not just anyone would do.

This is why she is pacing in her room, going to the door, flinging it open, then stopping before actually exiting. Rinse and repeat.

What the hell.]

What the hell?!

[Yep.]

[So Santana and Brittany are in Brittany's room, listening to music. Brittany keeps getting up to dance to certain songs, shaking the bed and therefore the polish that Santana is attempting to apply to her toenails. After the fourth time a streak of polish ends up on Santana's heel, it's a little tiresome.

This is clearly the perfect time for some sort of interruption!]

[Santana's at the pool. She is at the pool because she actually felt like swimming instead of just lying around in the sun and getting brown. In fact, she didn't feel like being in the sun at all; it was too hot outside and the pool indoors was nice and cool and didn't have bugs.

So she's at the pool. She's got a nice fruity drink and a couple magazines waiting for her nearby, along with one of those mp3 radio players. It's blasting a summery, poppy mix of music, probably too loud for the enclosed space, but what does she care? It means she can hear it under the water.

She decides it's time for a break, and exits the pool, probably looking like one of those cliche slow-mo shots from movies. She can't help it that she looks fantastic in a bikini, right?

Once she's sitting, she turns down the music a little, does a double take. Of course the comm is recording. Cue the eye-roll.]

Get a good look? [And off it clicks.]

[Santana is on a manhunt. She is stomping her way down the halls and larger rooms and will soon be heading outside in this thorough search.

She checked Kurt's room first, of course. She's not stupid. He wasn't there, which just meant the pain was delayed.

As the network and/or random passersby may notice, she is muttering something under her breath. Something along the lines of...]

"...going to kill him."

[and:]

"As if I'd ever touch him."

[also:]

"--if he's told other people, I swear..."

[and so on.]

[It's been a week since the whole thing with Tim happened. Santana has not checked the network, has not left her room, has not spoken to a single person since.

Yeah, that's gotta stop. She's decided she needs to get over herself and this pathetic shell of a once-awesome person, and get back to normal. The way she was before she got too attached. The Santana that didn't care about anyone but herself and one other person who was no longer around, the Santana that was a total bitch to everyone and reveled in it.

The Santana that never said no to anyone who was offering or asking.

And this is why that Santana is making a comeback, out of her dark room and wandering the mansion. She's at the pool, she's in the tea rooms, she's in the halls, she's wherever her feet take her.

(She's also just slightly tipsy, because it's called liquid courage for a reason.)

So as of right now, she's in the music room, wearing something like this, fucking around with the instruments, and singing snatches of a certain Amy Winehouse song.]


[[if you are over the age of 15, she will hit on you. while also insulting you, most likely. if you exist, she will probably flirt anyway.]]